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In the first couple pages of a health class workbook I’m going through (that is Bible-based) the author tries to scare the crap out of you about living an unhealthy life. I am all for living a healthy life and I also feel that it is natural and quite free-ing; once you get rid of the mindset of seeing “healthy” as restricting.

This class expounds on the fact that sickness causes problems. And I understand this to a degree not as drastic as the author makes it seem. I get sick frequently with allergies, sinus issues, and colds, and I understand the problems (or the results) of illness.

The points this class makes on the problems of sickness include (in my opinion and making a person feel guilty of) inconveniences our illness makes to our family and our small world, the fact that the person helping us is incapacitated by us, that those serves shown to us are wasted on us, that we rick of giving our disease to innocent others, the other fact that someone must pay for the expenses, and that if we have a job, we do our employer an injustice by being sick.

Last but not least (this deserves a quote), “It matters not how spiritual we are, how alert our minds, or how warm our hearts; when our bodies are sick, we cannot use them to serve the Lord properly.”

My reaction is one of disgust. Some of these things are true. But it seems the author of this curriculum never had a family member with cancer or even took care of someone they loved that was sick. My love language is physically caring for those I love; random acts of kindness; bringing soup to my ill friend because they crave it. These things fulfill me. I am not incapacitated by taking time out of my day to bless someone I love. My loved ones do me no injustice if they can’t make it somewhere; my reaction is to drop what I’m doing and care for them somehow. To go lay around and watch TV with them for a couple hours if that blesses them.

Serving someone you love, being there for them, is one if not THE best way to show some on the genuine-ness of your love for them.

I hate sickness, especially cancer. My much loved uncle found out that he had leukemia in May (thank God he’s in remission now). My sisters and I tried to right him a letter every four days. I never had thought of him so much, loved him so much; just the awesome thought that I could take time to possibly bless HIM, while I ceased to think of myself for thirty minutes while I wrote him. Were those “services” wasted on him? I think not.

I think giving of yourself, and the attempt of helping someone, are the greatest acts of love.

“If there’s any kind of magic in this world it must be in the attempt of understanding someone sharing something. I know it’s almost impossible to succeed but who cares really, the answer must be in the attempt.” From the movie Before Sunrise

I am not very spiritual, but I think that the last point the author of the class makes of sickness stopping us from serving God is the most wrong. Amy Carmichael was sick for the last twenty something years of her life, but look at the incredible things she did in India…and there are so many stories like that. There is a verse somewhere in the Bible that says, “The Lord uses the weak to lead the strong.”

Do you not think that the people God uses the most are those that have the heart and the willingness to serve him, no matter what their physical condition?

Booyah health class!


just kind of breathing after a lot of things happening


i would like to make this. i am serious. someday.

coffee on the front porch, migranes, rain, making up songs on the guitar with a 10 year old.



Dancing to the beatles. The life around me has been so bitter sweet lately, and I want to share it with you.  I started work at the pool early mornings again, and while I am getting paid again, and getting tanner (is that possible?) it is draining and upon returning home every day my voice is almost gone. I have a couple funny stories to tell however. I asked one of my kids (that I teach, not that I gave birth to) how old they thought I was. He answered after some consideration that he thought I was 37. After laughing some and saying he was a little off he guessed 35. I’m pretty sure I do not look that old…

I went to a scrumptious place called Yogurtland with my friend Tina.  If you come visit me we are going there. There is nothing bitter about that sweet friend.

I am trying to go and visit my best friend, Em, who lives in Austin sometime in August. I haven’t seen her in a year and a half, and I miss her painfully. But we stay in contact. Blessed emails, phonecalls, texts.

There was a graduation of some sort where some really unique people that have touched me (though they may not know it) finished up the year they were in Texas and went back to their homes. I know that though they are not here physically and may never come back, they will always be here in their hearts. One of those students are staying two weeks after their year was over; and they are staying in my bedroom. It is a good interesting. :)

I went to the mall, bought a dress, saw a movie, talked with my friend Elsie. I need to find a different word to describe good. Agreeable, pleasant, memorable, genuine.

Today, I went to church wearing my new dress. Had a wonderful baked chicken lunch. (be jealous of my mom’s cooking!) Best of all, was told that I was beautiful, smart, and wonderfully weird by a special person.

Off to the library!

P.S. I want to let you know that you are making me break one the ten commandments, I COVET your comments.

i’ve taken to journalling through random bursts of artistic brain sparks…that was on the back of a wedding invitation.



I feel my brain shutting down into minimalist mode again. I want to share current happenings but when I begin my mind begins to wander. Bear with me as I try to unwind the wad of string and pick out the random objects that are caught in my brain.

This is the first day the past week and a half that I have been fully aware what has been going on. Boston was a bunch of busy running around pretending that everyone knew what was happening. I miss people there. I made so many new friends. The circle of my friends at church expanded and now I fill up the entire break before bible fellowship giving hugs receiving hugs and talking. Hopefully no more standing around awkwardly. Even though awkwardness is my specialty. Tiredness was a given and allergies were a given, yet getting a bad cold along with more than one fever wasn’t. That was Sunday night. Yesterday afternoon I finally felt able to get out of the house (which I was dying to do). And today has been restlessness galore.

Things that are on my mind; my mind is a deep hole in the earth somewhere, with lots of living things crawling around in it and some dead ones decomposing in it; some flowers having roots in it, some weeds, and an old shoe.

You can see that it’s really no use and I will just ramble.

have you ever journalled in the shape of a tree?

the things i will always carry with me on this trip are the new friendships and memories of stepping out beyond my comfort zone.

more to come. :)



the freedom trail


at harvard. :)




see you in a week! (I will be in Boston soaking up ((for the lack of better words)) awesomeness) those non existent blog readers that I love! I expect lots of love from you to see when I get back! ;)


P.S.  I bought a journal. and I took artsy picture of it.




I’m sorry about the title. I have no idea what to but up there.

Topic: New things

Subtopic 1: Camera! I recently bought a Sony Cybershot 9.1 megapixels 15x zoom: love. I haven’t had much time to get to know it (I work a lot) but when I do I will let you know what I name it.

Subtopic 2: Sadly, Leopold is the only fish that is still alive. He eats enough for four fish though and makes indecent smacking noises in his bowl.

Subtopic 3: Amy came home for the weekend and brought 4 awesome hilarious people with her. Cat (a january MI) is the reason for the title of the previous post and the new favorite starbucks drink. I love her.

Subtopic 4: I am going to Boston (yes, Boston!) Friday morning. It is a choir mission trip. Hence the three hour rehearsal Tuesday….I absolutley love my choir and the people and the friends and the jokes. Tons of pictures to come.

Subtopic 5: I am in a folk band called Bumbler and Puesdo the Singing Cookbook.

Note: My mind is incapable of typing fast, thinking fast, and thinking with out it being outlined in to topics and subtopics. I can think like that or in black and white or likethiswhichisstrangelyrelaxingwhenyoudon’thavetoworryaboutpuncutation.

Or in song: “You say goodbye and I say hello.”