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it is the day of new birth…and i want to share the things i am thankful for.

i am thankful for my family and for how amazing they are. they love me so much and i have come to appreciate them more than they know!!! i love each of them in their own way and i am so thankful that i am close by that i can come home to see them. i love my dad and how he is my rock and always gives good hugs. i love my mom and how she is a constant reminder of how God is in control and how He loves us. she is always willing to talk and i love her for her. my oldest sister amy is a steady encouragement to me who is willing to share with me. she is the best big sister. ellie inspires me. she is constantly trying new things and dressing just how she choses, being tasteful and artistic and always loving jesus. clara is the last, and the best leetle seester. she is cute and doesn’t mind hanging out with me. i love her for everything about her. my family blesses me. i don’t deserve them.

my heart overflows tonight. i am so thankful for my God, is so faithful and leads me in his path. I am excited to see what this next year will be like…i look back and see HIM in my life this past year…even though there are so many changed things and differences. he knows what he is doing. i get caught up in me. i must me caught up in Him. lessons learned.

MY HEART IS BIG.

 

it has been too long i believe!

it has been busy. the major things in my life right now are: work. getting stuff ready for college. family. friends. sleep.

sleep is last, and my body feels that acutely at this point.

i ordered my dream neclace from bellawish! i can’t wait to get it in the mail!!

ellie and clara get back from india tomorrow! it is going to be so exciting. i am making crazy signs.

pray for my youth group as we embark (on a 13hr bus ride i might add! look below) to denver, colorado to help serve the edge church!

^not really on one of these, thank god. : )

When you try your best, but you don’t succeed
When you get what you want, but not what you need
When you feel so tired, but you can’t sleep
Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can’t replace
When you love someone, but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

And high up above or down below
When you’re too in love to let it go
But if you never try you’ll never know
Just what you’re worth

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Tears stream down on your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down on your face
And on your face I…

Tears stream down on your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down on your face
And on your face I…

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

this was an email to chupp. it describes my life at this point.

my rooms been clean for the first time in a WHILE
my closet is clean
my fish bowls are clean
i finished the second harry potter movie with christina tonight.
i found one last blue pop ice in the freezer
i don’t work tomorrow
i repainted my toes :)
my laptop came back today!
there is a legit antivirus program on it which makes me feel SO much better.
i get to sleep in tomorrow.
i have you to talk to.
i am tan.
when i am tan i don’t wear so much makeup and i feel better about myself.
this guy at work added me on facebook and hes CUTE. me thinking-“FINE you can stalk me.” *click*
i did alot of productive things today.
i rested all this afternoon.

its been a hard week. its been a busy week. physically, my back has hurt worse than it ever has (due to sleeping on the wrong side of the bed. you know when you wake up and find yourself backwards with your feet at your pillow? yeah..) and headaches have been bad. saturday i worked, and it was after all-night-prayer, which means staying up til 12 or 1am. so saturday morning i worked at 8:30am. woo! then there was fruitealicious and then there was a frantic shopping for gifts at…dun dun dun…bath and body! i had a fabulous deal though. have you ever put on old fashioned dresses and learned the king and I dance and various square dancing moves in a perfect backyard on a perfect texas evening? well then you’ve never had fun like the beers girls have fun.  : )

seven brides for seven brothers?

sunday was mothers day!!! we went on a walk after lunch…after i woke up from my 2 1/2 hr nap. i love my mother dearly. I LOVE YOU MOM!!! I also had to work on sunday evening.

((goodness, its WINDY outside!!! chupp was telling me about the wind in her letter. now i kinda understand….))

monday was normal but i hurt my shoulder/back : (  tuesday was working and bible study and late night driving. and late night phone conversations : ) and good books. wednesday i got to the massage therapist. bless her. and thursday….senior banquet at church. today, senior banquet at ecc!! busy.

the thunder comes, the wind brings destruction. the computer, is off.

<3

Another year you made a promise
Another chance to turn it all around
Do not save this for tomorrow
Embrace the past and you can live for now

And I will give the world to you

Speak louder than the words before
And give them meaning no one else has found
The role we play is so important
We are the voices of the underground

And I will give the world to you

Say everything you’ve always wanted
Be not afraid of who you really are
Cause in the end we have each other
And that’s at least one thing worth living for

And I would give the world to you

A million suns that shine upon me
A million eyes you are the brightest blue
Lets tear the walls down that divide us
And build a statue strong enough for two

At last get back to you
And I will wait for you
Cause I would give the world
And I would give the world
And I would give the world
To you

This is the New Year
A new beginning
You made a promise
You are the brightest
We are the voices
This is the New Year
We are the voices
This is the New Year

this is the new year by ian axel

this song expresses my feelings about this new year. i got a couple books at a book sale and i didn’t realize the gem i had found until i started reading it last night. its called a gift from the sea by anne morrow lingbergh.

You’ll never see the courage I know
Its colors’ richness won’t appear within your view
I’ll never glow the way that you glow
Your presence dominates the judgments made on you

But as the scenery grows I see in different lights
The shades and shadows undulate in my perception
My feelings swell and stretch I see from greater heights
I understand what I am still to proud to mention, to you

You’ll say you understand
But you don’t understand
You’ll say you’ll never give up seeing eye to eye
But never is a promise and you can’t afford to lie

You’ll never touch these things that I hold
The skin of my emotions lies beneath my own
You’ll never feel the heat of this soul
My fever burns me deeper than I’ve ever shown to you

photo by callyamanda

You’ll say “don’t fear your dreams”
It’s easier than it seems
You’ll say you’d never let me fall from hopes so high
But never is a promise and you can’t afford to lie

You’ll never live this life that I live
I’ll never live the life that wakes me in the night
You’ll never hear the message I give
You’ll say it looks as though I might give up this fight

But as the scenery grows I see in different lights
The shades and shadows undulate in my perception
My feelings swell and stretch I see from greater heights
I realize what I am now too smart to mention, to you

You’ll say you understand
You’ll never understand
I’ll say I’ll never wake up knowing how or why
I don’t know what to believe in

You don’t know who I am
You’ll say I need appeasing when I start to cry
But never is a promise and I’ll never need a lie

-never is a promise, fiona apple.